The Real Foundation Of A Relationship

Been thinking how the blame is always on the EX but never on us. We are quick to call him all sorts of names and put him on blast. In reality when a relationship goes sour it is really the 2 parties and not just one person that is at fault. The question is then what if he is a cheat or a liar? In reality how innocent are we when it comes to cheating all we look at is the sex. Cheating is not only sexual not being 100% real with your partner is cheating also. The question we should ask is what really was the foundation of the relationship.
People say that when you love is the foundation of a relationship but i personally disagree. Love is a seed that is planted and grows more and more each second. The love plants becomes stronger by each trail and victory both parties encounter in life not by material wealth or looks. The real foundation of a relationship isadaptabilityy. The coming together of 2 personality is not going to be a rosy fairy tale affair. There would beargumentt, there would be nights you can not stand each other. There would be talks from friends and community. The truth is for a successful relationship we should accept both weakness andstrengtht. We should go in with patience and understanding. It also comes down to the first meeting in setting the pace knowing what you want and being open about it. We all have what attracts us but does it also keep us in? TheHerculess body drop dead gorgeous guy might be all that physically but there is no personality after the attraction. In our community we complaina lott on how it is hard to find THE ONE but then who is the one we seek? The best is to makeoneselff that person who your Mr. Perfect would want to date. Challenge yourself to look more into personality than sexiness. A great personality would always show physically.

I know many would disagree with me but as earlier stated this thoughts are my own personal view. Been through so much that now I see life differently in a more humble and down to earth manner.  I ran into a guy i have not seen in a long time and when we intially met he was everything our community would classify as not dateable but now things are different for him in every aspect of life.                                                

Food for Thought

I rarely post but just have to say something. The news about the school boy who shot students in Chardon, Ohio is something that got me deep thinking. I read a bit about the shooter T.J Lane and i thought bullying is deeper than we know. He was a student in a special education school and was taunted and always segregated from others. I relate that to the gay community where a high percentage of us live in the physical level and anyone not par with that "gay" level is mocked and avoided. I then asked myself how often do I look at people for who they are than what they look like. How many friends do I have who care more about others than being a GQ poster man. I personally belief that a truly genuine beautiful personality would show in your appearance. I say this because each time we diss another person each time we throw shade each time we show off we indirectly saying we are superior than you and that is what bullying is all about. The irony is everyone complains that gay people are fake but yet the person complaining is no less materialistic. Those who are forever remembered are those who positively effect changes in the lives of those around them. There are many people who need our help but to help genuinely we must understand what it means to live with the basic necessity of life.

Why do gay gys living outside their home country still live in bondage? Sex and sexuality? Is the bible really homophobic?

Why do gay gys living outside their home country still live in bondage? Sex and sexuality? Is the bible really homophobic?

What I really want.

I am gay and Nigerian. I am not a retard, stupid or fool. I have no mental defect or brainwashed by "western world". I did not wake up one day and decided to be gay and be hated by the world. I am who I am. I am a son, brother, cousin, uncle, nephew, friend, neighbor, coworker... Homosexuality is never by choice or evil spirit. I have never asked for permission to get married as a gay Nigerian all I asked was to put laws that would protect me from discrimination, violence, hatred and murder. I want to know that if I am attacked and I report to the police I am not at risk. I careless about marriage for now. I know how hard it is for people to misunderstand all things sexuality. They think that my sexual orientation makes me a devil advocate. I am stigmatized for what I had no power over. The Christians condemn me to their hell the Muslims condemn me to death I have come to the realization that my life is all about me, no matter how judged I am by others none of them put food on my table. When I die I die alone. I rather live for the truth even if it means 14 yrs in jail than to spend my whole life living a lie because of a biased society filled with ignorance. I am gay does not mean I hate the opposite sex or cannot have children. I am gay does not mean the ec0nomy of the country would be terrible or the lives of our citizen would depreciate. I am gay does not affect the quality of infrastructure in the country. Call me whatever you want but I am gay and it is who I am.

An African Gay Experience: Sexuality and Spirituality Nigerian Gay Experience

An African Gay Experience: Sexuality and Spirituality Nigerian Gay Experience

Sexuality and Spirituality Nigerian Gay Experience

African's are living in a religious environment. They claim homosexuality is not an African culture. They blame the Western world for it influence and say we should hold on to our African values. Yet they use Christianity and Islam to judge homosexuals and i ask are those religions African culture?

Sexuality and Spirituality.

http://www.soulforce.org/forums/showthread.php?t=100 The reconciliation between sexuality and Spirituality is one that is usually ignored among the lGBT community. The result for many is to end up in either 2 extremes. The first is that we become victims of Society's religious belief and then castigate ourselvs for who we are. The second is we become villan's to the word Spirituality and denounce it's very exsistence. A few are able to come midway and truly understand that there is a need for an equal balance between sexuality and spiritiuality. These extremes also is more commom in some regions. The frist extreme is popular among bible. religious areas where there is a large homphobia cryout and folks hide their sexuality due to avoiding castigation and punishment. The second is found in liberal areas where people do not care about anything and belive that they fully own their lives. The truth is we all need to balance the Spiritual and Sexual beign to have a complete and healthy beign. We are made up of various beings which are: Physical, Social, Spiritual, Spiritual, Emotional, Intellect and Sexual beign. We always want to balance all these in our lives so as to have stability and progress. One is not more important than the other and one lacking is not a complete person.